I have to agree with the above poster. I've had ect twice and both times it was a life saver. One was after a near successful suicide attempt where I too was facing long term hospitalization (in a state hospital - hell on earth). The ect pulled me up and out. I was actually able to go off meds entirely for about six years before symptoms returned severely enough to affect my life functioning again. The second time I had ect was this past fall. Meds worked to keep me out of mania but were not touching the awful debilitating depression I was experiencing. Ect saved my life again. It took many sessions (21) to pull me out but it did and it made the meds I'm on much more effective. I was not able to go off meds this time and probably won't be able to for a long long time but at least they work now. I've been relatively stable for eight months. Had a couple of small episodes of depression and of course when my husband died I had a foray into severe depression but I bounced back and am doing quite well given my circumstances right now.

As for memory loss, I'm sorry to report that my memory was totally wiped out by both experiences. I had to have mostly bilateral treatments, and a LOT of them (36 total) to get me out of my depressions. So my memory took a big hit. I forgot how to get places I'd been going for years (including work!). I forgot the majority of my coworkers' and students' names. And unfortunately I've forgotten some important things. Likes and my husband took a vacation to Lancaster for our anniversary two years ago and I only know because I saw it in my timehop. I have no memory of the actual event. I have no memory except for one of taking my son to see the steam trains in PA. I don't remember my son's fourth birthday or anything that happened last fall at all, Though it was mostly bad so I guess that's not such a loss.

I do feel like my cognitive functioning is not what it used to be. I have much more trouble recalling things and unfortunately I've forgotten a lot of my teacher training so I'm basically relearning how to be a teacher.

However!!!!! I would do it all again in a heartbeat. It has saved my life twice. I guarantee I will have to do it again in the future. And I will. Even though it sucks, it has improved my quality of life so much that I'll take the memory loss and cognitive functioning issues over that horrific depression any day.

So basically you have to weigh your options and decide if it is worth a shot to relieve your misery or if you'd rather stay miserable and keep trying meds, since you may find a combo that works if you stick it out long enough.

Good luck! Pm me for more information if you like.