You can't tell people to be "good for you". You can't control the other person.

Something either need to be accepted as it is or people move on.

Sure some quit but entering relationship hoping someone will quit whatever they were doing prior to you is a bit naive. It's her life style. All her friends are users. I assume she has the kind of job where they don't do drug tests etc

You are already helpless and depressed and you two just met! You should be happy and content and full of excitement. If you are depressed now that early on imagine how it's going to get?

Are you planning on having kids one day? Marry?

Love isn't enough

And to use your heroin example. One meets heroin user and smart choice is NOT to enter relationship with them rather than start relationship and hope/ask them to quit. It never works this way

Again read Alanon literature and go to few meetings please

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk