Ok so I have not read all the responses to your posts but I understand where your coming from. I too have trust issues, same with bad experiences asking "the system" for help, and also do not want to tell loved ones about the s******l thoughts that I have for fear of them worrying. I called a suicide hotline once only for them to call the cops on me and have about 15 police hold me up and handcuff me in front of the the whole town, literally. Then lock me up in a small mental place for a few weeks. Twice. Also the last time I went to a hospital, then respite for a s*****e attempt. I left there early giving up my legal rights. In other words, I too would get locked up in a mental hospital or whatever the laws see fit if I made another attempt in the near future. So I hear you. On the other hand, I would love to be in an IOP if I had the chance as I feel that is what I need right now. It seems logical for them to want you to sign the contracts, even though I too would be hesitant, but I would do it anyways if I were you.