Perhaps with your therapist work on your communication styles with others? Negative self talk, takes time and effort to rework negative self talk to rational self talk, an ongoing process.
As far as hurting others feelings, finding literature to read, reflect, implement on the difference between healthy expressions of dissatisfaction and unhealthy expressions. One assets personal preference, the other judges and shames and is sometimes classified as controlling. For those close to you, still, can they help with an honesty that points out when mental filtering lacks during mania or depression of your bipolar illness?