Hi Betenoire, I am so sorry you are feeling so embarrassed and ashamed of your body because of self harming. I understand why people do self harm. I was reading how self harming causes chemicals to be released into the bloodstream like adrenaline and other hormones that act the way meds work to reduce our stress. It becomes an addiction just like alcohol or drugs can be. But meds are different because they can be a long term solution to self harming if they are adjusted regularly to maintain emotional stability and low stress levels.

If you feel so bad that you are self harming, that could be a reason to ask for an emergency appointment with your psychiatrist to adjust the meds. Some people I know also have a med they can use as needed to help them reduce the stress levels without harming one's body.

I always try to look at my falling down and making mistakes over again without judgments. Self condemnation only seems to make me feel worse.