Relationships with other people make me anxious. Interacting with people at work isn't hard because I can keep them at a distance. But getting close to people is hard. I also get anxious about my romantic relationship because of previous experiences, which causes me to pick everything apart and only able to see the negatives. In that negative mind space, I start questioning my happiness and whether I might be happier single, even though I logically know my relationship is great.

I guess that's what causes me to feel anxious now. As to why I feel anxious: I was in an abusive relationship through high school and my first year of college. I didn't know how to ask for help and I pushed everyone in my life away. I put up walls so everyone would think I was fine, but I was severely depressed and on the verge of suicide. Compounded by the fact that as a child I felt very isolated in my family because I was very different: intellectual instead of athletic, interested in video games and toys instead of the outdoors. Also, my family isn't very emotionally expressive; we all tend to internalize.