Ok, yeah...I agree with everyone. I don't know what my problem is. I don't like that I have this problem, it bothers me. Yes maybe what others think has some type of influence. I have a lot who look up to me, people who feel proud of who I am. I feel like I'm disappointing. I'm actually disappointed in myself. I just need to stop I guess. Which I plan on doing. I just wanted feedback, why? Idk.