You repeatedly refer to your situation as "this problem" yet you're not very clear on what that problem actually is...


First I was under the impression it was your attraction to these men, but that doesn't pose any actual problems for you. Then I thought it was your inability to stop talking to these men, and now I'm really not too sure I understand what it is you're talking about.


Or maybe I'm just tired and am not very good at comprehending atm...


The problem you're referring to, is that the incessant need to know why they talk to you?

The feedback you crave?


If it is, well its also simple, well in my book anyway.


You got divorced, didn't have any male attention for years, felt ready to jump back in the saddle, and now you're faced with two guys, who are just your type and you want some validation.


You want to know that they find you attractive, desirable, smart, funny, etc.


You want the green light, the approval, the nod, the thumbs up that means you're wanted.


And you know what?


That's perfectly natural, ok maybe the borderline obsessive bit is not ok, but the stuff behind it is.


We all want to know we're good enough. We all want to feel wanted or needed.


Thing is, with the type of men you prefer, they're highly unlikely willing to make you feel good enough.