Hi..
At first I appreciate for being so nice to him in in fact it is not your only responsibility to make him happy as well as it's not only your fault if you are having some issues.
For the porn preferences...there could be several reasons in brain...you might ignore this habit .....hopefully after around 10 years he will be a changed person....
for the sexual intimacy...you both need to do hard work ....otherwise it will be worst soon.or later...
one thing you can try....just do whatever he does in the same manner.....hope he would get what it means ..

thx
love