Hi profound betrayal, I'm so sorry that you feel so overwhelmed, no one deserves to live in fear, but contemplating any other life can be equally frightening
I have been told my depression is very much due to my relationship with my husband, but it's easy for experts to tell you to get out, living it is another thing altogether.
Sorry I haven't got helpful advice to offer, but I really feel for you and maybe by bumping this up the list, someone will find it who has more ideas.