Blimey has it been 6 months already?! Wow. I'm pleased things are much better for you. I don't think you've damaged something permanently, if anything it sounds like you've realised that the high isn't real and is actually unhealthy for you so it gives you the knowledge to learn if there is an unfortunate toxic new relationship you somehow stumble into in any part of your life in the future. I wouldn't stay away, if I were you I'd just keep checking in with myself and know I can make a decision to leave at any time if I see things are getting a bit out of hand. It sounds like you're able to see the warning signs this time around. Take care of yourself - and well done for getting support on the NHS! Thanks for the update.