Hi.

Your story is pretty interesting.

I have recently been "re-diagnosed" with ADHD at age 40. It is quite profound but I have finally come to fully accept and understand that I have ADHD- the combined type, and what that means. My case is quite pronounced I'd say.

I know some young women that I am close to, that I am highly confident have ADHD, but they will not listen. They don't want to have it. Currently one of them has been influenced by her boyfriend due to her irritable and explosive moods to try various anti-depressants via a doctor, of course so far with no success.

Wait until you try the medication.

You have about a 70-80% chance of finding a stimulant medication that you can tolerate and that will largely control your symptoms. Of course that means you have perhaps a 20-30% chance of not having a good response or having significantly unpleasant side effects (rarely dangerous though).

You should probably start with a stimulant, give it a fair go, and if it fails consider trying another stimulant. If that fails, consider trying Strattera.

Due to various complicated reasons, I am currently on Strattera, which I find solidly moderately effective at treating my symptoms, and Strattera can improve more with time according to the data (over a few months).

However, due to cost, and other reasons I am discontinuing the Strattera and trialing Dexamphetamine soon, or I am supposed to be in a couple of weeks.

I have been on Ritalin, and it was 80% effective I'd say, but I discontinued because of side effects.

I can tell you when you find the right stimulant or medication, it TRULY will improve your life quality. This does not mean it will solve every problem in your life, or that you are going to live in a happy, happy heavenly like state for the rest of your life, but having the symptoms managed is very satisfying.

Even with the Strattera, in my case, it has basically made the difference between sitting on welfare and being unhappy, moody and dysfunctional (partially due to being unable to achieve much in life) to going back to study and being happy, confident and organized- although I still struggle moderately with various significant symptoms, so far.

Work with your doctor, it sounds like there is a good chance you have found a good solution to your problems, so that you can move on and meet your proper potential in you life for both productivity and happiness. Thankfully ADHD/ADD is usually an effectively treated disorder.

Oh and just to add, yes it is quite emotional when you suddenly realize it is not your character, lack of acceptance of responsibility, and willful disregard for social norms that has caused you difficulty all this time. All the while you have likely been blamed by various others and yourself. It is a bit like a form of personal psychological imprisonment. Soon you will hopefully be free!

Best wishes.