Moonkin I read your first post earlier and wasn't sure how to reply. I'm back after doing some weekend chores, errands, and reading.

I think it's awful that she's going to have to be gone for 3 weeks right when you are starting and trying to get comfortable with her. It takes time for that to happen, especially if you have trust issues because of previous T's.

I was really really glad to see you say that you're not giving up! That is great. It's hard to commit yourself to going and going no matter what and even especially when you don't feel like it or you're having doubts. I am committed that way too; I will go no matter what and especially when I don't want to or don't feel like going.

I think that your current T being shocked about how many T's you've had in a short period of time is hopeful. She sees that as an injustice done to you and I'm guessing it made her feel sad and made her really really want to be there for you and help you. Can you think of her being shocked as an expression of her compassion and interest, do you think?

Since she is going to have to be away, she may choose to keep things kind of 'light' for now so that when she has to be gone, that won't happen right in the middle of something the two of you are talking about.

I'm an adult, Moonkin, and I was intimidated by my T for a while too. Keep going so she can show you that she is trustworthy, compassionate, kind, and interested in what you have to say. Go at the pace you are comfortable with. "Begin where you are" my T tells me.

Some T's do not assign a diagnosis at all and some do it after they get to know you a bit.

Keep going and keep talking, you're doing great!!

ECHOES