I'm so sorry you're going through this, Jake. I wrestle—well, I say wrestle, when really I barely ever even put up a fight—with self hatred too. Being alone with only the frantic, hateful words in one's head can be a horrible experience. I would know, and it sounds like you would too. I guess I'm not really giving much advice. I'm just offering my empathy. You'll get through this. I know it doesn't seem like it. And you don't need a relationship to complete you. They can be great, but if that's not what's meant for you right now, then there are so many others things to live for and have fun doing. I'm even younger than you are, and I feel like giving up on my life sometimes. But really, there are things worth living for. Our lives aren't over yet. Which means that they could, and will, improve. But. I'm sure those sound like empty words to you. They do to me sometimes too. I'm sorry, Jake. Take care.