I'm going through a major mixed episode. This is something I haven't had happen in many years.

I am NOT a danger to myself or others.

Met someone special and it seems to have triggered a major manic episode. I've been taking meds just like I am supposed to and also keeping up with my mood journal (as hard as that is right now). My med combination works great, but even that couldn't stop something like this. I am grateful that I am on meds or I'd feel a lot crazier than I am right now.

I have learned that when I am feeling some strong emotions like this, not to act on any knee-jerk reactions I may experience, but to go inside myself and be quiet for a while.

I don't come out of my shell very much, nor do I drink alcohol. This month, I've done both...a lot. Not so much drinking, I've only done that 2x this month. Don't have a problem with alcohol, so that's not a problem.

I've come out of my shell a lot with a certain young man whom I've just met this month. As a result of this mixed episode, I moved him right into my place to live with me. I realize that I was way not thinking straight. I would never do something like this if I were not going through this episode right now. I would consider dating him, but this guy's got a major drinking problem, otherwise, I would hang on to this man and never let him go, he's just that neat of a guy (when he's sober, which isn't much). That's the deal breaker.

I know that I will end this living together situation very soon, but I'm safe, it's quiet and right now is not the time to be making any more sudden moves, even if it means him living here until I feel stronger, more stable.

I feel so alone as if no one else in the world has ever felt or done things that I have done recently. I know that this is not true or this place wouldn't be here for me to come to and share.

I guess I just really need to know that I am not alone, that I will come through this.

Also if anyone has any suggestions on coping while going through this, please leave a response. I will be here, at home, relaxing with my dogs today and just being here, without judgement, in the moment (I am also learning self-compassion).