Thanks everyone. I'd like to tell T about the bedtime story thing. I think it's important for him to know where the heck I went to while he was reading.

Incidentally, I was able to remember the particular psychoanalyst he was talking about. Of course I ordered the book today.

I wish that it would arrive tomorrow because I know it would sort of help me to stay connected. I checked the book stores around the city yesterday, but no one carries it. I think I'll go back to my Nancy McWilliams book. That should help.

I hope I don't feel very depressed this week. Besides for the obvious reasons as to why, it is also the time in which i need to call T more than ever. If I am not very depressed then I can keep myself busy and hold out til the session. When I am depressed, although I'm technically still busy, I am just going through the motions, unfocused, feeling like there is no possible way I can hold out until the session without talking to him.

Every week I grow more attached the than the last. Every eweek the connection grows stronger. Therefore, every week is the week that it hurts the most. .