|
It's difficult when the meds start to work and the delusions start to melt. I'll reread something wonderful that I wrote, and suddenly see it through saner eyes as incoherent nonsense. It's kind of a kick in the emotional gut on a few levels.
As CopperStar said, there are pinches of truth in madness. It's been emotionally difficult to pick through the junkyard of manic ideas, but doing so carefully I've found a handful of gems - new perspectives, stronger beliefs, and even a few research ideas that are worth following. And a lot of stuff that I had to painfully discard with a grimace.
I have kept a lot of the imagery from that time. In my case, it was suddenly beautiful sometimes-religious symbolism surrounding mountains and whatnot. While I have lost the manic obsession around the analogy, I still find it a comforting place to rest my mind and a natural way to interact with my beliefs.
That being said, I had to wait a month or two before going back to think through these things. Too soon and I'd be pulled back in a bit.
You said that you feel as though you're waking from a beautiful dream. That's the best way to start your new day. :- )
-:- M
__________________
>>Dx - manic-depressive (BP1)
>> Rx daily:
Seroquel/Quetiapine Fumarate
Lamotrigine/Lamictal
>>PRN:
Ambien/Zolpidem for acute insomnia
Ativan/Lorazepam for anxiety or hypomania
|