I am having a very hard time coming to grips that my EXGF and I cannot make a relationship work. We have a VERY strong connection, and have admitted that we both feel comfortable more than anyone else in the past. We know that there are feelings there and we love each other but we have been off an on for a year. We couldnt stay and always came back. All in all we were best friends and wanted to spend every minute together.

Background- She was married and it was bad, with a little abuse and addict. She is still bitter at her ex after 8 years and he still tries to cause trouble with the kids. Well when she pulls apart is when things get good, and too close for comfort. This last time she said she is not healthy for a realtionship and we should be friends. We are fairly intimate just prior but she would say no to sex, as she stated she needs to be careful and doesnt want to get hurt.

I know and she admitted that THIS is about FEAR. Fear drives our decisions. Well I finally said that being friends (after 3 weeks) while we have feelings (or at least me) cant be. As friends, it was just as great with no intimacy of course, but still flirting some.

Now after I said this. She said that the reason we cant be together is that her feelings has changed and she does love me but not in any physical way. Before she said it was bad timing.

The question that I go over and over with is, if a strong connection and love isnt enough, then what is? There was so much there yet so much was in the way

ANYWAY-- that may sound like a rambling but I need to vent and hear others opinions.