Hi Fuzzy,

I'm sorry you're struggling
And it can sometimes come naturally to think about things, what if.........
But maybe try planning the other way around too..........e.g. a few lists, right there, of songs which may help slightly if things are hurting...........some "go to" songs which might lift your mood just a bit if you're hurting/struggling e.g. I know you like piano music but maybe there are other songs you can add as well that could help. Although maybe you've already done that??
And I know sometimes very little, including music, makes much of a difference (if any!!) but maybe the planning of things that might help a bit right now??
And hopefully talking with us might be in those plans (??)...........because if there's just a tiny chance we may be able to help.........we care, and we're here for you

Alison