I need a new t. The one I was seeing says I have a clean bill of health and we can terminate. My life is not completely stalled - it has moved forward. Just hits me like a ton of bricks sometimes that he is gone. And it hurts so much. And I don't know what to do with the pain. So I get angry and post a dumb post, instead of bawl my eyes out. Thanks for your support divine1966. Hope things are going well for you.