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Old Aug 04, 2015, 10:12 AM
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Leah123 Leah123 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Washington
Posts: 3,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by Soccer mom View Post
My mom passed away last year and she was very emotionally distant and also drank and used prescription pain pills. She was controlling and manipulative. My therapy has evolved from having all these unmet needs come to the surface and wanting them from my T. to now realizing I will not be able to get them unless I give them to myself or find them elsewhere.

I used to cry so easily in between sessions and not really understand why I was so upset - I couldn't put words to these feelings. That seems to be getting easier. I found out a co-worker is seeing my T. She needs help with her daughter and I completely understand. However, I got jealous and didn't want to share (like a toddler, I guess). My rational brain knows that in a small town T. will have many clients I know (and I know a few). But, kid me doesn't want to know/share. Kid me wants to feel important/special/cared for. I know my husband gives this to me, but it's not the same. It's more of a maternal craving.

I cried this morning that I even care. I don't want therapy or my T. to affect me this way. I realized driving to work that it all goes back to my mom. I still want things from my T. that she can't give me and it sucks. I know I have to grieve this but sometimes I think I'll never stop wanting it.

Have any of you realized what you didn't get from you mom and process it enough that it doesn't bother you anymore?

I have, in two rounds. The first round was learning to self-mother, the second round was learning to accept help in mothering from my therapist. It has eased the pain tremendously but taken a lot of time and effort.

Last edited by Leah123; Aug 04, 2015 at 10:26 AM.
Thanks for this!
lagoonist, unaluna