You have been suffering for 8 months existential depression and negative thoughts. Then you say you tried 7 therapists and medications. Medications are unfortunately slow to work and you need to give them a chance to work. At least 6-8 weeks and if no improvement then discuss another medication. How many have you tried? Re therapy. 7 therapists in 8 months? I think someone needs to tell you straight to stick it out longer unless you just freakishly found 7 incompetent therapists in a row. It is a crappy condition for sure and obsessing over the meaning of life when there is not much of one and obsessing over all the bad things in life which you can't control will naturally lead anyone to depression. If you have seen doctors what exactly are you dignosed with?

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