Hi Rapunzel,
I found that really interesting, and useful what you said, because I had been in recovery in the fellowhips for 12 years before finding out about pd, I was only used to self diagnosing, and the experience of being told by someone else what I was was a total wierd out experience, I was fascinated and triggered by it too! , and I found it funny in a strange way. All I had known was people listening to eachother and realising, - 'yes, I'm an alcoholic', or - 'I'm a sex and love addict', I had never needed to be told any of it. So, when I got to therapy with this US T. over the phone, I was deeply thrown off balance to say the least when she 'told' me things, like she knew better than me. In fact it felt totally crazy making, and I felt more and more unwell. Now, I think I'm piecing together what has been happeing, reading here and I think I'm getting more understanding. She felt it was her job to know more than me, and for me, it felt like she was always trying to be in power and run off with the informational lead. And so, the only thing that I felt that was of value that I had was my recovery, and my understanding and my lifeling willingness to search and search for the truth, and then she comes along (well, ok, I came to her), and seems to want to make me helpless and take over from me. And I got so triggered and inside I was complying with her or wanting too and feeling crazy, and paralysed and obsessed by trying to be seen and heard by her before I became totally drained of all value and have sold my soul in my attempt to get the recognition I longef for from her.
Yet I loved her, she understood me with warmth and resonance In my experiences with the pd, in this she understood like no one else had ever.

I feel very emotional, now, I appreciate having been able to share this and for you 'listening'. I have been able to express this now, in a way I havent been able to before. Thank you so much. I hope some of it made sense.
I'd love to hear more from you, or anyone here.

River.x