Dear Pdoc

These feelings for you are so strong. I think about you all day long. I get butterflies in my belly. But it also makes me nasseous. I'm so sick of it. I wish I could turn it off, stop thinking about you. stop being in love with you. It hurts. I won't ever know how you think about me. It probably wouldn't matter, you can do much better than me. But it hurts. Unrequited love. I will never know you. Soon will be the last time we see each other. I'm sad. It ****ing hurts.

Why did I had to meet you. If I asked for help earlier, when the depression started, then I wouldn't have met you. If I didn't choose to go back to this T, then I wouldn't have met you. If I didn't had chosen to try medication, then I wouldn't have met you. But I met you.

You are a very good psychiatrist. You are the second best person with whom I had to do therapy wise. I had to do with about 25 different people in therapy, psychologist, psychiatrist, drama T and more. Most I didn't really like. Some were very bad. You are good. You were so good with me. But was it worth the pain I now have?