This obviously isn't about him.
This situation is about you turning the tides on your ex's. It sounds like your inner "tape" is saying, "Not this time. I'm going to take charge, I'm going to be the one." But instead of being in charge, you're nitpicking. Your ex's were emotionally distant, so you have to push him back with ridicule. You don't like him being cheap, but said he was broke. But your ex's weren't were they?
He didn't get the right this, he didn't do enough of that, he should have had this ... compared to what? Anything he does that doesn't meet your expectation comes back to your ex's:
Quote:
|
Seriously one way or the other men took advantage of me financially ( even if they made a ton of money!!!) and took me for granted.
|
Quote:
|
I like that he is different but it is like too different
|
Etc, etc.
This new relationship (and any other) is going to be a struggle until you can close the chapter on those past relationships starting with your father. My understanding is that it starts with forgiving them all and then the real work can begin on knowing when something he does is really inappropriate or if you're lashing out at something from the past.