Quote:
Originally Posted by Shadix
I am sick of people perpetuating this delusion that society is equally kind and accepting to everyone and that if a person isn't able to get socially integrated it is their own fault for "not trying hard enough" or something like that. That's easy for you to say if you are one of the people who is naturally liked by others, because all you have to do is be friendly and you will get accepted. But there are many of us who people for whatever reason just tend to be annoyed by us. When we try to be friendly, people will often react in a rude disparaging manner. In my opinion, somebody who is constantly rejected and disparaged by other yet continues to be social and outgoing likely has some sociopathic tendencies. A normal person will NATURALLY become withdrawn. So who's fault is it? The person who does what ANY NORMAL HUMAN BEING would do in thsir position or the people who put them in that position in the first place?
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That is very true, in my case. I have been living the life of a loner, being secluded and only going out when absolutely necessary or when fulfilling my job descriptions. I also maintain quite a few friends, but they are mainly on Facebook, though I know them personally. I still try my best to be friendly to my FB friends, even if they don't care about me personally. I had another FB account and a lot of friends, but in the end I deleted that account and stuck with just one. Yes, I have this kind of a loner personality, be it in real life or online. Even with some friends I made in school, I have chosen to drift away from them for reasons of my own. Now, I have little or no contact with any of them.
As for this single FB account with just a single friend, it's a test for me to be more sociable. As I really like this person, I have to slowly change my loner personality by trying to be open to and interacting with her. I don't expect her to reciprocate, but at least I am showing my social side. As Georgia Bridge put it well, "And in order to change it I have to want to change it." Being more sociable, at least on FB, is just a first step for me.