I have been to hell and back with my son who will soon be turning 21. I am literally scared to death. Since about age 18 he got into weed and booze. Started drinking excessively his first semester in college and then up until a few months ago. Has a girlfriend going on 3 1/2 years and I honestly have no clue why she stays around. He is VERY controlling and is seeing a therapist due to his anxiety issues and depression. MY Therapist feels if that he can get the anxiety and depression under control he won't drink like he was. Told me not to worry about the weed issues. So he usually makes it 4 weeks of being sober then he relapses. During his sober time he is basically a nice person. Still very selfish and controlling but not mean and aggressive. SO this time he made it 8 weeks without booze. Then asked his gf to buy him a 6pk, she refused so he dropped her off 15 minutes from her home and left her there. He felt he did no wrong when I confronted him.... I told him he can't be treating anyone like that, he just doesn't get it. So he will graduate college in December and plans on moving by himself to CO. He wants to get involved in the weed industry..... We are currently looking for apartments or extended stay hotels but they are so expensive and he has no job lined up yet. MY biggest fear is that he will be drinking in excess out there because he will be alone and that will be depressing.. He will be 1600 miles from home so I can't just go if something happens. I keep praying that God will come into his heart and change him. I am scared. What kind of future does he have? IF the gf finally calls it quits with him, he WILL go off the deep end. I don't blame her if she decides once he moves out to break up because he is underserving of her. He is not a nice person. I have a daughter who is just the opposite so I feel it is not how I raised him. I don't know how to Let Go and Let God??? I worry constantly about my son, about him drinking, about him always asking for money. He finally got a job and is making a little but he feels we need to help him once he moves and if he falls on hard times wire him $??? He is reckless with his car and who knows what will be when he gets out there. I just wish sometimes God would take me home because I can't stand this life.