Dear T

I'm not ok. I'm afraid to be totally honest to you. I can't talk about these thoughts and feelings to you. I did it once, months ago. Why haven't you ask me about it after that session. Don't you wonder if I still think/feel like that? Shouldn't a T sometimes ask about it, espicially if she knows the clients has those thoughts? You're a very good T, but I feel like I can't talk to you about this.
Pdoc did ask me more about it, but I can barely talk to him, let alone about such a hard topic.
I just don't know what to do. I feel so bad. I wish you would ask me about it. I want to know if you really care, if you are worried about me. I feel like I'm just another client. nothing special. It hurts, I think I'm a client who has seen you the longest. I went with you to the other practise and then to this one. You would think you might care a little bit more about someone like that.
I don't think I matter to anyone.