My son came home from the war, came home a different person. I don't know where or what your bf did, but they need time to decompress. Think of it as one day ur in a fire fight, kill or be killed, then home. My son still jumps at lound noises, looks at people in a different way. I'm sorry if it seems like your left out of the loop, try to give him time. Thats what my son asked for.....