I'm glad you left that message. I think it will help him take the lead. Very brave, indeed.

All T's are different. Some are not into the connection and relationship aspect with their patients. Many are into problem-solving, which is fine. Have you asked? You could use examples of other relationships you've "read" about, you could cite reading Yalom or other relationship, psychodynamically oriented therapists and gauge his response. That may give you a clue on whether or not he wants to foster that kind of client/patient rapport without having to say it so directly.

I know that I couldn't talk about the hard and painful stuff without feeling attached to my therapist and knowing that he cared and that we had a relationship. Others would prefer that their therapist remained an impartial outside figure and not another relationship to worry about it. It sounds like you may be afraid to open up because you don't have him quite figured out yet. Trust takes a long time. I know I couldn't get anything out for the first 2 1/2 years, and it was very frustrating.

I hope you can keep your functioning going. It's very scary to come unglued. (((Purplemoon)))