Dear T, I hope you do check on me even though I said not to. I don't know how to ask for what I need can't you see that. You must know that about me. I had my first panic attack in your office and then you asked when I wanted to come back, Didn't you witness my pain and humiliation. I can't do that again, i'm unraveling. My worst fear is losing control and that is exactly what is happening. Why won't I let you help?