It sounds like you have a lot to deal with and you are having a hard time.... That sucks and I'm really sorry :-(

If your meds aren't working you need to see your pdoc and if you feel unstable, the sooner the better.

Do you have a therapist to talk to? It might help you to sort through some of the social stuff and the trauma from being bullied so badly.

FWIW, I have bipolar II as well but I don't relate to much of what you describe...but everyone's different.

I have never experienced wanting to (or enjoying) hurting someone, or the extreme ambivalence about social stuff. I also don't feel detached in the way you describe. It sounds horrible for you :-(

I do become somewhat antisocial when I'm depressed though and I withdraw from people. And of course I'm way more social when I'm up.

I really hope someone can offer you more I can.

This is a great group and there is a lot of collective knowledge here.

And stress and not taking meds can do all sorts of stuff...



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