I never believed that myth anyway. It always seemed like it would be nice to have a close family or that family would always be there when you needed something, but being in a very tiny family, there wasn't much family around anyway to even wish to depend on.

What I realized a long time ago was that family is what you are born into & that doesn't mean that the person is even one that you would choose to be friends with just because they were part of the family. Even parents aren't our choice.....& it doesn't mean just because we were born to them that they would actually be our choice of people to want to be with.

I think it is important to surround ourselves with the people who we enjoy being with & who bring out the best in us......why surround ourselves with people who make us miserable just because they are "family"????? I can't force myself to like someone just because they are family....& I sure don't want to be miserable because I "should like them because they are family". I am alone now that my Mother died. I have distant relatives who are definitely very nice people & I do like being around them, but we aren't close.

I have met people here in Kentucky that care a lot more & are much kinder than family ever thought of being. It is great to choose those you want to be around, those that bring out the best in you & not your anger. There are frustrating things in life that cause us anger enough that we don't need family adding to that.

Being an only child, my only ability to have people around me were the friends I choose & I kept those to only the ones I really enjoyed being around. I never had the blood thing going, but also never understood why people make themselves miserable trying to force themselves to be around people just because they were "family"?

Surround yourself with people who you like & those who like you & it seems to me that life can be pretty wonderful then. I always backed away from family when they got wierd. My grandmother could be very nasty & I refused to cater to her just because she was family. I was there when she was sick & made sure that she was taken care of when she was Dx'ed with altzheimers........but when I was young & she was mean to my Mother (her daughter).....I was the first one to tell her knock it off & put her in her place. I wouldn't put up with her just because she was family....& I learned that I was respected more for standing up for what I knew was right rather that tolerating the crap that was being handed out.

My personal view on family ties,
Debbie