My take on offering suggestions after reading threads in other forums: I welcome them so long as they're not delivered in an "ouchy ("tough love") fashion.

I figure, if someone's crawled to a computer keyboard and put the monumental energy in to putting their pain down on paper....unless they specifically say "I just wanted to vent - no advice, please"....I'm saying something if I feel like I have something helpful to offer.

Not to do so amounts, for me, to watching somebody drowning, going under for the 3rd time, and hesitating because you're not sure they want your help. Huh? They're a little busy freaking out and dying. An engraved invitation is quite likely not possible.

Besides, they can always ignore my advice and do something else, and/or (you hope not) just let themselves go under.

If somebody is in pain, I'm not just gonna stand there and ponder political correctness. It may only be a hug or a kind word, or an "I heard you" - or it may be a to-do list for them...but I'm going to try to help them.

I know not everybody has to want that but when I'm in the pit, I know I'd be so beyond grateful for someone extending themselves to me that it'd be unexpressable.

I realize that oftentimes a person WANTS to help but they can't figure out what to say. I'm not talking about those times, though. I'm talking about when someone has an idea(s) but holds back.

Sometimes the world we live in today makes absolutely no sense to me.