I just wanted to say that I have seasonal patterns to my episodes as well. I tend to be down in the winter and I always get manic in June. I use a blue light in the winter to help with the depression (it's called seasonal affective disorder or SAD here when it happens like that) but I have to be careful of it because it can trigger mania if used wrong (and wrong means wrong for me so I have to carefully monitor my own response and adjust each day or week. Some years I can't use it).

It does sound like you are hypomanic and not feeling very good at all. Unfortunately the answer to that is probably meds even though I know you are reluctant. I think for me I've just decided that I can live on meds or not live off them so if they have unavoidable, unknown consequences I'll deal with those when I have to and just try to minimize the issues now as I can.

Is it possible to get in to see one of the really good psychiatrists so you feel more trusting? I do not know how healthcare works in Japan; I'm actually extremely ignorant on that point. Even if you do something now and wait a long time to get in you might get some relief in the moment and long-term relief from that appointment.