Hi I haven't written in a while. It's struggling at the I feel as if I'm completely alone. My family live far away I moved because of bad memories. Over the last few years I've struggled with work. Sometimes I just want to stay in bed and hide. I hate myself for doing it but I can't face it. I have been signed for the past three weeks after being at my new job for just a couple of months. My best and only friend helped get me the job and now she hates me because I've messed up this one as well. I've lost five jobs now because of this. I feel better and go back to work and then it hits me. And that's it I'm falling into the black cave and I can't see the light at the end. I hate this when will it get better. Please when I've lost my job again and I just feel so useless. What shall I do someone please help me. I don't know what to do why do i feel so happy and positive one day and so down.the rest. I'm so sad I feel physically sick I can't eat or sleep. I can't carry on like this..