Since my therapist left for medical leave without giving me the referral she promised, I started using the psychology today website to find myself an interim T. The first one I met was awful. She had a pre-determined program that she uses for all clients, and when I told her that some of the things do not fit with my belief system (I'm an atheist and do not practice anything "spiritual"), she tried to tell me that I would change my mind once I was "ready." I decided not to go back to her. The second T I met with 2 weeks ago, and I thought the appointment went well. She gave me the homework assignment of writing down a narrative of all the women in my life who were maternal figures to me, and who eventually left. I did the homework and was mentally prepared for my second session today. However, I woke up to a phone call informing me that she had decided she did not want to work with me because she decided I need a trauma specialist. I never said anything during the session about wanting to work on trauma. In fact, it seems ridiculous to think I would begin doing trauma work with a T I just met, who I only plan to see for 1 or 2 months, while my regular T is on leave. Regardless, I can't make a T want to work with me. I just wish that she would have had the consideration to let me know that sooner. Our session was 2 weeks ago! She waited until today, the day of our next session, to cancel? After I did a really emotional homework assignment that I now have no one to talk to about? So she abandoned me after assigning me homework on my abandonment issues? That's just cold. And now I can't find any other LGBT therapists in my area who are taking new clients. I must have called at least 20 and these were the only 2 who bothered to call me back and said they had openings. Honestly, I'm feeling kind of angry at my regular T for failing to give me the referral I asked for and putting me in this situation. Oh, and to top it off, I decided to join a group therapy thing, and the facilitator said she would call me last week to check in on me since I said I was going home for the week and would be forced to see my biological mom. But, of course, she failed to call-- and I really could have used that call, especially now that I don't have an individual T. Ugh. It makes me not want to go back to the group (which I've only been to once) because now I don't trust the facilitator. Why do people, especially T's, say they will call or give referrals-- when they never follow through? How hard is it to get a little bit of help and consistency? All this experience has taught me is that I should never trust anyone. If someone says they will do Z, I should assume they will not because anything else leaves me disappointed.