Hey Sweetie, I can't help it but i'm going into my social worker role. Bummer huh? I realize that you are disabled and that there are many things you can't do independently and it sucks to rely on others. Have you ever thought about housing for the elderly/disabled that is accessible and where a lot of your needs could be met more easily? I don't know your area at all but I know that I hate needing anything from ANYONE. Maybe there is appropriate housing there where you can have your dignity and independence back. Good luck.