It sure pains me to see the subject line of this thread. Don't you think "hate" is too strong a word for a child that you raised? Sure, she has problems, but she didn't come to have them all on her own. It's probably the fact that your husband and you were never on the same page when she was growing up. You two basically taught her to play one against the other.

If I were you, I'd try to get a better handle on the relationship between your husband and your daughter. I'd look at my behavior as well as my feelings for and about her, too. Why doesn't your husband listen to or seem to care about your feelings in this?

There are other options than her living with you. She could get on Welfare and find her own place to live. Your husband could still provide her with other necesities that Welfare wouldn't provide but without supporting her financially.