Sunday funday? no.

Ive had a ****ed up day today. Ive been super pissy and just down right irritable all day. I skipped church (big deal, if you know me.) I just didn't wanna deal with it. I did eat out with my family but I was in a sort of bad mood. Then I just slept all day. I drank some wine hoping to calm down but felt no difference.

I hate how I look. I hate my bipolar. I hate my moods. I hate my body. I hate the direction my life has taken.

The nightmares have stopped, thankfully. The anxiety isn't *AS* bad as it has been but Im just so damn angry!!!!! Im supposed to calk pdoc office tomorrow and tell them how Ive handled the up in zyprexa.