-- Small possibility of triggering if you're uncomfortable with any mention of sexuality --

So you guys know I'm in group therapy. I've complained about it enough times after all.

Well, earlier today I remembered what I dreamed last night. There's a woman in group therapy with me who has been really nice to me. She even said once that she felt connected with me (seems strange since I barely say anything, but I feel a lot of warmth toward her because of it). Anyway, she was talking in group about how she doesn't like sex, doesn't have it, etc. (very sad). And anyway last night I dreamed that she and I were lying together and kissing, over and over for the longest time. The bizarre thing about this is that I've never had a same-sex dream or even a bisexual fantasy before (in 36 years)! I'm pretty much at the far end of the heterosexual spectrum (not even bi-curious, want only men). Now it doesn't particularly bother to me to have a dream like that (since I don't question my sexual identity), but it sure was strange. What the heck is happening to my head in there?! I've heard that sexual dreams aren't really even about sex, so maybe that's my mind trying to wrap around the idea of intimacy? I'm really terribly bad at being intimate and get extremely anxious when I'm asked how I feel in group. My mind always goes blank since I don't know how to share that kind of stuff. In relationships it's rare for me to have really serious talks with my partners. I just always shy away from that. I only had one partner ever that I was good at it with, and that may have been because we both knew we were ultimately unavailable to one another (backasswards I know).

Anyway, just was thinking about that and thought I'd share. Particularly since I have no intention of sharing that one in any of my therapies...

Sidony