I stayed stuck for over 30 years, seeing different ts the whole time. I just didnt want to face that my family just plain didnt like me. I could admit that my mother thought children "in general" were a burden, but somehow i thought i was not included REALLY. But i was, REALLY.

When i finally decided to stop pretending with her, to stop covering up for her, things got better for me. So i would ask you - is there something youre pretending about? Besides the "bad" t. What drove you to each other? What was missing in your life that made you both vulnerable? You dont need to answer to me of course - there is a difference between blaming yourself and taking responsibility. When i took responsibility to stop pretending, i was willing to accept the consequences. Mostly that i would be ostracized. But people who were in denial themselves were the only ones who were negative - everybody else was supportive enough.