Eye contact between me and my T is a weird thing. Most of the time I can make eye contact and it's fine. Sometimes I have to break eye contact because I can't handle seeing all the warmth in her eyes. Two sessions ago, we were doing a trauma therapy called lifespan integration therapy, and I have to close my eyes for that. We went through my timeline 4 times, I think. In between going through my timeline we talk about what it was like for me and if any new memories surfaced, and each time, before starting my timeline, I didn't want to close my eyes and stop looking into my T's eyes. It was just so nice to see her warm smile. But yesterday I had to talk about my attachment to her (transference?), and I felt so ashamed that I could hardly look at her. Whenever I have to talk about something that's hard to talk about, that's when it's hard for me to make eye contact.