Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Worth It
Integrating alters really means acceptance. Accepting that those alters were necessary for YOUR survival, not the survival of the system. There was no system when you were born.
Integration is not "self" destruction it is SELF-reconstruction and welcoming her/the self/you back to the world. It is never too late, it's just time to do it when the self becomes strong enough to take charge again. And, not scaring those alters. You aren't destoying them. If they think that's what you are trying to do, they will "act" up and some of that will go on anyway while the integration process is happening. Just remind them that they have/had and an important place in your life and it's time for them to grow up/accept as well.
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"Self destruction" is in reference of a final coming apart as in a breakdown...a tight rope we walk (bipolar doesn't help). Blend is more like back to faking being "normal"....like we always have for decades.
Sorry, we don't exactly fit in the DID mold as you know it. We are plum effing crazy.
There's no hope for integration here. We are happy with co-operation. After 18 years of incidents of trauma and severe abuse, this totally withdrawn individual that was scared of the light of day so close due to RA, had to learn how to cope with life at 20 years...skills any 8 year old possesses. Besides, we're 2/3rd through our life cycle, so whatever.
Our others are our only way to deal with people, places, and things. Even alters had to create alters because we were so oppressed, and not one of us is capable of dealing with life on our own.
There is no host, no original present, no core...we are always changing. We are the epitome of ruint. There is an alter for ever situation, job, emotion, opinion, feeling,...
The others laugh at integration because they know it's not going to happen, it seems a little lot far fetched to me, too. So far we have a list of 30 named others, and they say there are hundreds...thousands?
I get to play on these forums because I do the home life. Most of the others could care less, unless they try sabotaging this account....which they have, and most of us here has witnessed that...but we are getting along at present.
The workers go to work, the driver drives...Speed Racer or Ms. Ace Driver who does the speed limit, always signals...
Of course the shopper shops, the Cook cooks, the Male Human Relations Officer does his thing and all his alters, same with the Fems...and the list goes on and on. Ultimately, no one is in charge, not No_one, but no one.
So when I say "survival of the system", I literally mean "survival of the system".
Call me crazy....I always have.
