Your coping strategy is a one way ticket to blowing out your liver. One glass of wine with a meal, I can visualize as being safe, but you're putting away whole bottles of wine.

That was pretty close to where I was at when I quit drinking. I binge drank on occaison for the same reasons you do now...to cope with my depression. I was putting away 1 litre of alcoholic cider at a sitting.

It's a coping strategy, but not a very good one. If one is putting away drinks to deal with emotional problems, s/he is a problem drinker, because this thing has a way of growing on you. It stays with you like a lost puppy. When I drank like this, I also found that I minimized the problem, saying "It's not that bad." Well, it was.

Just because your levels have remained stable for a long time doesn't mean your health isn't at risk.

I'm currently on Wellbutrin and while it didn't take care of all of my depression, it did take care of my fatigue. It did not change me for the worse. Then again, my doctor is hesistant to raise my medication levels for fear of what it will do to me (I have cerebral palsy.)

There is more than one type of anti-depressant out there and you have to be willing to experiment to find the one that's right for you. Alcohol messes with your health too much. Maybe not now, but you'll regret it in the long run, like smoking cigarettes.

I'm a writer too and one book I read on the subject said that writing and alcohol do not mix.

Psych Central does have a special forum for this, if you need to talk about it further..