Quote:
Originally Posted by AuroraBorealis75
I feel like I really need to talk about these romantic feelings for my therapist, otherwise it's just going to grow and grow and get in the way of therapy. I've written a first draft of a letter that I plan to read to my therapist, and would really welcome any thoughts or advice on what I've written. Thanks in advance!
I have to talk to you about something that is really scary for me to talk about. I know you said that nothing I could say would make you walk away from me or tell me we couldn’t do therapy anymore. But I am scared this might be the one thing that would make you walk away from me. I am scared that you will be repulsed by me and not want to work with me anymore, and that would be as painful as hearing my mom tell me she wished she had never had kids.
I know that what I’ve been referring to as my “attachment” to you is called transference. I’ve been talking about this with others on the Mental Health Forum, and everyone says that this is a normal thing to happen in therapy. But it really scares me because the last time we were working on my timeline it started to feel like a romantic attraction. I don’t want to have romantic feelings for you, and I want you to know I would never ever expect you to feel the same way about me. This is also scary for me because it brings up the question of my sexual orientation, which I thought I had sorted out, and there is so much baggage around that.
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Oh goodness. Do I ever not envy you for being in the throes of transference. It all but took my life. But hopefully your t will actually understand what it is and handle it appropriately. Sounds like a great letter, you are expressing what your feelings are and it sounds honest. What could be wrong with being honest in therapy? Nothing in my opinion. It is your therapy, you are paying. So you get to bring up the things you need help with and would like to work on. I only hope for your sake that your t will handle it well. Good luck!
Keep us posted how it goes.
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