I am genuinely physically ugly.
It's weird because I have a different picture of myself in my head and when I saw myself on the TV I was both fascinated and embarassed at how ugly I am.

So anyway, after seeing myself on the news I withdrew some. I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide myself. I felt like a monster but I forced myself to go outside and do what I was required to do anyway. I tried to act as If I had not just seen how strange and ugly I look on the outside

I realized that people still said hi to me. They still sought my company and sat next to me. They still smiled at me and joked with me. And hugged me...

No one looked at me with the expression "Oh my Gosh she is so ugly." nobody avoided me or looked away in disgust, or seemed embarassed to be with me. It was strange to interact with them when I was thinking in my head "can't you see me? didn't you notice that I am hidious?"

Then I realized that the people in my community are used to the look of me. I realized that people outside my body see me every day and are used to the physical features that I find so startling about myself. Many seem to care about me anyway.

If others can accept me as I am, what's going on with me that I would not accept me as I am. So i am imperfect, ugly, ordinary...I have average smarts, average talent...nothing special here... I'm just me. and that's really ok.

I don't like being ugly. My spirit is not ugly. But, this is the outfit I have been given here on earth. There's not a whole lot I can do about it. It'd be a waste to let my looks stop me from being entirely and authentically me. I'm not extraordinary, but life is. There is room for me here and there is so much wonder and beauty and, well, LIFE to experience...