I am in no way an expert on anything, but you seem to have a lot of self-doubt. You don't want to go out and find someone because you can't see that someone would want you.

Do you have other interests, like books, cooking, photography, travel? I know many people that had no luck finding love/companionship until they stopped looking. One friend loved taking walks with his camera, snapping pics of flowers, trees, people. He joined a photography group where they learned to take better/different pics. He was never looking for someone, but a women noticed his pics which she found were beautiful and amazing. They met outside of the group and eventually got into a long term relationship.

The point is that sometimes you just have to stop trying, because the anxiety around trying to find someone can itself be a barrier to trying.