in 1996 i was in a abusive relationship.Since then i have not dated much.I have liked a few guys.But they have all been jerks.Plus i get hit on by guys from East St.Louis and that is the Ghetto and i'm grossed out by guys from there.I go out to baseball games and concerts and have not meet many guys that i like. Then i can't get this one guy i use to be friends with out of my mind.Even though he was one of the guys i liked. That ended up being a jerk. At times i feel really lonely and ugly. I'm 36 and feel lonelier the more time go's by. Some say i should attend church. But i have issues with orginized religion.What should i do?