im wondering, do you have abuse issues in your past that has led to your difficulties with intimacy? if so, the sex therapist would have been the wrong type of therapist. you would need a therapist that specializes in trauma. oftentimes trauma leads to a bpd diagnosis, often misdiagnosed as it is really ptsd.

it may be too late for this relationship. sad he is not patient nor compassionate and caring enough to understand. sex is not everything.